Why Your Brain Gets Stuck in Fight-or-Flight (and How to Help It Reset)

A few years ago, I went through a traumatic event that sent my nervous system into overdrive. I was stuck in fight-or-flight mode—my body reacting as if everything was a threat. I even had a full-blown panic attack inside a cryochamber (not exactly the relaxing experience I was hoping for 😬). No matter what I did, I couldn't shake the feeling that danger was lurking around every corner.

I was completely overstimulated, swinging between anger and sadness like a rollercoaster I couldn’t get off. The smallest things would set me off, and I felt like I had zero control over my emotions. Have you ever felt that way? Or watched your child struggle with big reactions and wondered, What is going on? Why is this happening?

Your Brain Is Just Trying to Keep You Safe

When we experience stress, trauma, or even constant overstimulation, our nervous system can get stuck in alarm mode. This isn’t a malfunction—it’s your brain doing its job to protect you. The problem is, we’re not meant to stay in that heightened state for long. Dr. Satya Sardonicus, a chiropractor and expert in the neurobiology of stress, explains that when the brain stays in alarm mode for too long, it changes how we experience everything—making even everyday situations feel overwhelming and triggering.

This is especially true for neurodivergent kids, who often have heightened sensory sensitivities. When their nervous system is in fight-or-flight, they may react strongly to noise, touch, transitions, or even changes in routine. It’s not that they’re being difficult—their brain is simply responding to its environment the best way it knows how.

How to Help the Brain Reset

The good news? We can help the brain shift out of survival mode. One of the simplest and most effective ways to do this is through proprioceptive feedback—or, in Dr. Satya’s words, “feeding the starving brain.”

One easy tool? Squeeze hugs! .

Squeeze hugs are a simple but powerful way to help calm the nervous system using deep pressure. Here’s how to do them:

1️⃣ Use Broad, Deep Pressure – Place your hands flat (not using your fingertips) and apply firm, steady pressure. Think of it like a warm, grounding hug rather than a massage.

2️⃣ Target Joints & Large Muscles – Start with the hands, arms, shoulders, or legs. Gently squeeze and hold for a second or two before moving to the next area. You can also do this on the feet for extra grounding!

3️⃣ Adjust to Comfort Level – If you’re doing this for your child, let them guide the pressure. Some kids prefer firmer squeezes, while others need a gentler touch.

4️⃣ Make It Fun! – Call it a "power hug" or "squeeze magic" to help kids engage with it positively.

5️⃣ Use It Anytime, Anywhere – Before transitions, after meltdowns, or even as part of a bedtime routine—squeeze hugs can help regulate emotions and bring a sense of safety.

Other ways to support nervous system regulation:

✅ Gentle movement, like swaying or stretching 

✅ Deep pressure activities (think weighted blankets or firm hugs) 

✅ Creating predictable routines to reduce anxiety 

✅ Providing a calm, sensory-friendly environment

You're Not Alone

If you or your child struggles with feeling constantly on edge, know that you’re not alone—and there are ways to help. Dr. Satya talks more about these strategies on Episode 85 of the Every Brain is Different Podcast.

Have you tried squeeze hugs or other proprioceptive activities? I’d love to hear what works for you!